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Author: River

River’s May Update

River’s May Update

Y’all, what if the coronavirus is a conspiracy to put sex workers out of work? Where are the YouTube videos about THAT?

Anyways. I’m still available for longer appointments and fly me to yous, and I might have an incall day in Fairbanks if it stays virus free for a whole month, but long term I’m shifting my focus to other projects.

It’s been amazing – life changing, really – to spend so much time at home without traveling. Sleeping in my bed every night on mostly the same schedule. Hunting and usually racing to eat meat hanging in the smoker. Tapping birch trees and making birch wine. The life I always wanted, and even built for myself, was waiting for me at home all this time. I’m not sure what that means for my future in this business, or even what the future of this business will be.

I still have a quarantine wishlist, if you’re feeling generous: https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/1238HP65W9IDH?ref_=wl_share

Hi, it’s me, your quarantine companion.

Hi, it’s me, your quarantine companion.

Wondering what a lady like me can do for you in a time like this? Let me fill you in:
This morning my friend told me I’m like a sexy life coach slash good friend, so I made this poster about it. Also my mom sent me a spoof of that Adele song with a guy very sadly singing through his window, “hello from the inside,” and I don’t want that to be you.
I have lots of snow and natural lighting to take almost any kind of picture you desire. You’re the director, I’m the model and photographer.
Here’s my fantasy: you decide this is the perfect time to hole up in a beautiful space with a hot tub (I can recommend some airbnbs!) and fully equipped kitchen with a hot lady, plenty of good cooking ingredients, Netflix, card games… do you like chess? Are you up for the slow torture of a game of strip cribbage? Want to immerse ourselves in tantra or a fetish role play for two weeks?
March: companionship in the time of covid19

March: companionship in the time of covid19

Hi friends,

In light of our president’s announcement a few hours ago that he would close the borders to citizens returning from Europe and then the follow up announcement from Homeland Security that he can’t do that but they might quarantine us in internment camps, I’ve changed my return date! I should be back in Fairbanks Friday night.

I thought none of you would want to see me, but I have been getting inquiries. On the one hand, I have no symptoms and haven’t been in any high risk situations. On the other hand, I was at one very crowded attraction where a lot of people were speaking Italian just a couple days before the Italian border closed and I would really hate to be Alaska’s patient zero. Back on the other hand, my bills do want to be paid…

As soon as I land I’ll try to get tested, and if I’m not patient zero I’ll be available Sunday/Monday in Fairbanks. Email me to book – Writetoriver@protonmail.ch – cause my phone is in Alaska. I don’t meet the criteria to be tested. I’ve been advised to self quarantine for 14 days.

After that, I’m gonna hide out at home in the woods like my elders advise until this is over. Wanna help me survive the apocalypse? I made a wishlist: https://www.amazon.com/hz/wishlist/ls/1238HP65W9IDH?ref_=wl_share

Sex workers: need a free place to ride out the pandemic? Love rice, beans, isolation and chopping wood? I’ve got a guest cabin for you.

xoxo,

River

Where’s River? Still Fairbanks

Where’s River? Still Fairbanks

Hi Friends,

I’m still in Fairbanks! On the 21st I’ll be leaving for Amsterdam, Prague, and adventures yet to be planned.

I’m starting my usual tax time special now, since it will be almost tax time when I get back. Get a deal on an overnight or an all day session and save me from the IRS at the same time:

Where’s River? Fairbanks forever.

Where’s River? Fairbanks forever.

Well, friends, I had plans for this summer but life had other plans and I seem to be in Fairbanks for the foreseeable future. It’s shaping up to be a nice lazy summer of construction projects and helping out a loved one during a health crisis. Are you my pleasurable diversion?

With that said: OMG no I am not “avail now.” When you text me “avail now?” I am: on my stomach in the dirt digging a hole, hiking with teenagers, taking a friend to a doctors appointment, sitting around a campfire covered in dirt and smoke, etc.

I am available for: outcall with trusted regulars or to hotels for well screened new friends who schedule at least a half day ahead, incalls of 2+ hrs for friends who schedule at least a half day ahead, and one hour incalls on my regular 1 night a week incall (generally Thursday or Friday, but not this week). Text me! Or email me! Let’s make some sweet summer memories.

 

Where’s River? June edition

Where’s River? June edition

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This month I am in:

June 12-14: Anchorage

June 14-18: Homer, very limited availability only with pre-booking

June 19-22: Juneau

June 22-24: Anchorage

As always, I appreciate those of you who plan ahead by a couple days. ❤️

Where’s River? February/March edition

Where’s River? February/March edition

Hey you,

I’m going to be in Williston, Minot, and Fargo February 27th through March 7th.  I’m thinking:

2/27 – 3/2 Williston

3/2-4 Fargo

3/4-5 Minot

3/5-7 Williston

but let me know if you have specific date/location requests for longer dates.

I might be in Minneapolis the night of the 7th.

I’ll be in:

Anchorage March 8-11th,

Kenai March 11-12th

And then I’m going home for a break! In January and February I was home for a whole month and it was glorious! I feel completely refreshed and I’m going to make staying home more for longer a major priority in 2019.

Do you have privacy concerns? Email me at writetoriver@protonmail.ch, it’s overseas and encrypted.

Please understand that I always screen. Depending on how you contact me, it may be completely behind the scenes and you won’t have to do anything, or I may ask you for additional information or a reference. If you won’t provide either a reference or the additional info requested, we will not meet.

Don’t forget to follow me on Twitter and Instagram for pictures and tour dates, or Facebook just for tour dates.

<3,

River

Off to Hawaii!

Off to Hawaii!

Hi friends,

Sorry it’s been so long since I’ve written!

I’m in Hawaii right now and it’s so much nicer than the slush I drove through to get to the airport. I’ll be available in Kauai November 24-27, and back in Anchorage December 4.

xoxo,

RiverKauaiDates

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